The Causes of Cancer

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So, are you drinking enough water?

Cause, you know, water is great for the healthy cells.

But, jaysus, don’t drink it out of the tap with all them chemicals!

And bottled water? Oh forget it, sure all that plastic causes cancer.

So are you eating enough veg?

That’s what you need now, loads of vitamins, but just be careful!

Because you know, all those pesticides can cause cancer.

And fruit, tonnes of it, load up on all that goodness, but just be careful!

Because you know, fruit is full of sugar and can feed the cancer.


So dairy, I hope you’ve given that up!

I read somewhere that cow hormones cause breast cancer so be careful there!

But whatever you do, make sure you’re getting enough protein,

You need loads of protein to pull through cancer.

But whatever you do, DON’T STRESS OUT!!!

Because you know, research shows that stress causes cancer.

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